Hair removal...

Pretty much all women struggle with unwanted body hair to some extent but trans-women obviously have a big arsed problem with this.  When my body was producing tons of evil testosterone I suffered horribly from the growth of horrible, brown shitty fucking mammal hair on most of my body.  It made me so fucking angry to remove it and see the stuff almost growing back before my eyes.  You just want to scream : 


WHY IS MY BODY DOING THIS ????!!!!


Now, thanks to the wonderful androgen blocker 'Decapeptyl'  (oh sweet, sweet Decapeptyl) the hair growth has slowed down a lot and it is WONDERFUL.  
I mean it's not a miracle cure but after years of it getting worse and worse it's glorious to have it slow down like this, I can tell you.


But for all this complaining it could have been worse.


So, hair audit.


When I was a teenage boy I started to grow bumfluff on my upper lip and chin.  It didn't bother me too much at first to be honest - but then I'm not one of those 'I always knew I was a girl, even when I was a sperm' trannies.  I started shaving it off and left my cheeks because I thought it wouldn't grow if I didn't shave it.  Er... not sure about that theory.


Although actually the theory seemed to be borne out because I didn't grow any hair on my cheeks - and I honestly thought it was because I'd never shaved them.  As the years went by and my feelings about being girly grew stronger I became more and more glad of this fact - and I still am.


From puberty till I started laser / electrolysis two years ago, I never really grew hair on my cheeks.  I'd get the odd one and shave them off - which didn't in fact propagate growth.  So that meant no sideburns or anything awful like that.


My Dad took my 'inability' to grow proper facial hair to be a sign of some kind of hormone imbalance.  What with the wearing dresses and everything.  
I wonder?


Actually not - I've had tests and (before I started HRT) I was a totally normal male in every physical respect.  Yeuch.  Not any more though - yay!


So, facial hair.  It became unbearable of course and I was so glad when I started laser treatment, which at least thinned it out.  Even though I only grew it on my upper lip and chin it was pretty thick and tough in both those areas, so my electrolysis lady tells me!


So you shave every morning - like a man does.  But unlike a man (well, most men) you put your make up on afterwards.  Foundation all over that area - followed by plenty of powder.  I never used to wear lippy much because I didn't want to draw attention to that bit.


During the day it would get darker and darker and if I was going out after work I would secretly shave again and put more make up on.  And we're not talking about a quick once over - I mean going over and over and cutting myself and going over and over again up and down and side to side.


In case you're wondering - I do use a boy razor for this because I figure they are designed to get as close as possible - which is what I want.  But I don't use boy shaving gel (!)  because I don't want to smell like a man, obvs!


After the hair was thinned out with laser treatment I moved onto electrolysis - which is more permanent but more painful.  Actually you hear horror stories but it's not THAT bad - it gets worse as it gets up to under the nose.  The chin is just uncomfortable.  I had the hairs on my cheeks done and they haven't particularly come back.  I get little ones on my neck which I tweezer out.


I got the idea for this blog because this morning, for the second time since I've been on HRT, I put my makeup on and FORGOT to shave first!!!  I did in fact shave (I still don't feel confident enough to leave it) but for that to happen is truly remarkable.  It's the best feeling.


So, moving down (I'm going to be honest here so get ready) - my chest has thankfully never been hairy - in fact most of my hair problems are below the waist.  I pluck the hairs on my chest, which I still get.  You have to watch for them (I carry tweezers at all times!)


Worse are the hairs that grow from my nipples.  Oh yes - it's gross.  Thank Decapeptyl they have slowed down because plucking them is a painful business and the ingrown hairs cause horrible spots.


Still get them though.


My arms, thank gawd, are no hairier than any other woman's so that's a blessing.  In fact they're considerably LESS hairy than some women I see!
Armpits are shaved - no problems.  Once or twice a week.




But I get dark hairs on the outside edge of my hands - I have electric tweezers which I use on those.  It hurts.


Once we get to the waist the real problems start.


A hairy bum is not what a girl wants now is it?  Difficult to remove - you can't get the angle for waxing it yourself - it doesn't work.  Oh yes - I've tried!
I use depilatory cream on these 'sensitive' areas and it's fine - and with the testosterone reduction it has slowed down massively.  Thank God, thank GOD!


I did burn myself quite badly with the cream when I first used it on the trail of hair which insists on growing up to my navel.  Actually that area is difficult - often it comes up in little spots.  With the reduction I've started to tweezer them in the hope they won't come back.


Legs!  They were horribly, horribly, horribly hairy in a way I can't even describe.  In fact tears are pricking my eyes as I write this and remember what it was like and how fucking gruesome I felt.  My legs were covered - absolutely covered - in thick brown hair.


To make matters worse whenever I removed the hair, even a bit of it, I was plagued with terrible itching and ingrown hairs and would scratch till I bled.


In the end I could bear it no longer and started to wax my legs about once a month.  Waxing was kinder than shaving as it grows back slower and less itchily!  But still my legs above the knees were covered in huge spots for about a year - really bad ones, like a biblical plague basically.


Eventually that got a bit better and, once again, since testosterone reduction it's all slowed down.  Now I shave my legs a couple of days a week and will wax the hairs near the top again soon.   Hopefully a lot of them won't come back after the next wax.


I think I'm down to my toes.


Writing this has made me realise how far I've come - and what a journey this has been.  Even just the hair removal story has been epic.


God, I feel so much better and so very, very happy.  It makes me want to hug everyone in the world!  You don't know what it's like - unless you've been there.  Never again, never again.  Now Jaye is getting better.